Oh hello blog. It's been awhile since I've last visited you. I don't even know where to begin and I think this just got a little awkward. Maybe I should re-introduce myself? Or try to tell a joke? Screw that. I'm a horrible joke-teller, just ask anyone I know.
Instead, I'll talk about last week. My mom, brother and I flew to New York for the dog show. It was really fun to tell people I was going to NYC, then have them get all giddy and ask, "Ooo what for!? Shopping? Shows? Yayyy!" then in a very unsexy tone, drop the ball with, "No, actually we're going to the dog show." Responses usually came in the form of, "...Oh. Wow. I didn't know people actually did that..." or "You're being serious? That's... cool?" or, my personal favorite, "..." Standard.
Oh hell yes we went to the dog show. And for the record, to all you cat-lover-haters out there: Dog people are just as fuckin weird as cat people. How many cat people do you know will let their pets freely lick their goodies, then turn around and lick their owners in the mouth? Maybe one in 500. Why? Because that's gross and cat people are smarter than that shit. Further, the amount of BIFs I saw floating around Madison Square was astronomical. Seriously, I could have sworn it was too good to be true, but around every corner I turned stood a tremendous BIF, just waiting for me to nonchalantly snap a photo. And don't you dare think I'm hatin on a good BIF. Just because I'm in charge of my company's Wellness program doesn't mean I don't appreciate a fine quality BIF when I see one. That's all I have to say.
Soooo we meandered through the dog show, excitedly pointing at dogs and claiming them as our own. I think by the end of the two days, we each had about 14 dogs on our list of MUST-haves, then maybe 12 more on the probably-must-have list, and 4 on the not-a-chance-in-hell list. What I REALLY wanted to do, but didn't (much to the WKC's gratitude, I'm sure), is buy a huge box of tennis balls and throw them in the arena at will to see what the doggies would do...
I think the best part of the trip, though, were our culinary adventures. Holy snazz. Each day we would find some super snazzy place to park it--mid-afternoon, like the ladies and gentleman we are--and proceeded to get day-drunk and tell each other how much we love and appreciate one another. If you haven't had this family-bonding opportunity yet, I highly recommend it. There's nothing like sharing a couple bottles of great wine with your mom and brother, then willingly spewing out embarrassing stories that you otherwise would never consider telling them. Most all of mine involve drinking too much then participating in some random act of debauchery that would only bring shame to my parents' name. Classy. This is what living alone does to you people: it drives you to having the time of your life, getting tipsy, then telling people about it. Who else am I going to tell? My cats? Ha.
